Usually the elders will fall asleep naked beside the pool. Grey undulating folds give them the impression of melting under the hot sun. You have to peel them off in the morning, like some geriatric burger, and flip them into their poolside hammock, so to speak. DO NOT forget to check their pulses. There’s only so much pounding and snorting these antediluvians can take before they pop. Found one old bird propped up on a walker once. Took us a few days for us to realise she had checked out. Kept stiff with powder until the rigor mortis set in. Usually you'll be fine, but if you do find a shell, chuck them in the truck and we’ll take them to the incinerator. No ceremony. They don’t believe in it. Old fashioned like that. Common sense. Scoop the scraps out from the swimming pool and place them in the receptacle on your back. It will get heavy and you will stoop. You are not shaped for the idle pleasures of these days. Youth is no longer wasted on the young. DO NOT be bitter. The pool itself will need a good draining from all the draining that went on last night. DO NOT put your hands in without the proper equipment. Use the standby net. Refill the bowls of prophylactics and Murray mints. Leave the keys. Some residents will request a sponging. Keep it quick and as unsensual as possible. That’s for your own sake. We try not to encourage them. If you make conversation, be polite. Do not be roused if they call you work-shy, or prudish. DO NOT talk of how the leaves of a tree might be hair, its branches the limbs of a maiden. They’ll only tell you that a tree’s no good for fucking, even if you imagine it to be a girl. A spade’s a spade to them; a hole a hole. What is, is. What isn’t, can get to fuck. DO NOT mention God. We ask that you DO NOT accept any intoxicants offered by the residents. We have had reports of spikings and defilements - attempted initiations into the wrinkled fold. Workers have grown old before their time while lacking the requisite means of doing so. DO NOT fall into the same trap. Restraint is our natural condition, pleasure theirs. These chains at least keep us from the sirens that have corrupted them, and for that we should be thankful. DO remember to wipe their bums.